For the third time that evening, Mike sprayed the charcoal in his grill with lighter fluid and tried to light it with the new long-nosed lighter his wife had given him for their anniversary, last week. The charcoal flared, nearly burning off Mike’s eyebrows, then promptly died. Mike threw the new lighter into the grass, as close as he’d ever come to cursing out loud since he was a kid. Steve emerged through the sliding door at that moment, carrying a plate of steaks. Their wives were in the kitchen preparing the rest of the food and chatting together about everything and nothing at all, the way women sometimes did.
“There are some days,” Mike growled, shaking the nearly empty can of lighter fluid, “when I figure it would have been easier if I had gotten one of those George Foreman electric outdoor grills.”
“They make those?” said Steve, setting the plate of raw steaks on the nearby picnic table and going to pick the lighter out of the grass.
“Yeah,” Mike said, smiling with pleasure, “he makes an outdoor version.”
“That figures,” Steve smirked, fishing in his pockets for a second, then producing a badly wrinkled grocery store receipt, which he wadded up and deftly poked into the fluid-soaked pile of briquets, quickly lighting it. “I’ll bet it works really well, too. Where do you suppose they sell them?”
“I think I remember seeing them somewhere,” Mike replied offhandedly, watching Steve with a mixture of admiration and envy, “but I just don’t remember where exactly.”
“Nowhere here, though, I’m betting,” Steve chuckled, bending to blow gently on the tiny flame. Slowly at first, then more quickly, the flame licked its way along the wadded paper until, at last, the soaked charcoal burst into brilliant flame — and kept on burning.
“Yeah,” said Mike, silently vowing to check the internet in the morning, “probably nowhere around here.”
As requested, I will provide to you the background for this dialog. My husband and I were wandering through a sporting goods store and he decided he wanted to stop and look at grills. The dialog itself is pretty verbatim, if presented in a different context than the original. Anyway, short and sweet. I hope you enjoyed it.